Life is hard.
I just turned nineteen years old and I have no idea what to do with the rest of my life. I have no direction, no drive, and no motivation to even wake up in the morning. I don’t want to roll out of bed and face my family. To look at my parents, who I hardly see as it is, and pretends everything is going okay when it’s not. I can’t stand seeing my sisters who seem so content in their everyday lives and wish to be happy. But I can’t be happy, and I don’t know why.
I don’t know what I want to be. I don’t know what type of career I want to start. I don’t even know if I want to keep living. Isn’t that saying something?
It’s like I have forced all of my dreams down the drain and now I can’t even remember what I used to dream about. I look back on the days when it was okay to dream with your eyes open and see a blur. To think about any life you want to live and imagine it can happen. But it can’t. I know that and understand that now. There’s no such thing as a fairy tale ending, or a happily ever after. It’s all just a bunch of complete bullshit.
So why try to be happy when you’re not? Why should I try to somewhat understand the concept of my unhappiness. Of this depression I have hidden away for the last three years.
I have had a lot of shitty friends and a lot of stupid relationships. I’ve wasted time on people who I thought would never hurt me and ended up crushing my heart in the end. I have pushed away love when it was at my fingertips and made myself believe in people who didn’t want to be with me in the first place.
I have loved and I have lost, I have been to my darkest point and I have been to my highest moment, but yet….it still isn’t enough. Life isn’t enough.
To live doesn’t mean you’re alive they say, so tell me what the secret to living is?
This is Victoria Soto, and although I didn’t know her, she is my hero. I don’t know too much about her. Victoria was a Stratford high graduate and only 27. She was killed after she hid her first graders in closets and cabinets and told the shooter they were in the gym. He killed her and not one of her children were harmed. God bless Victoria, her family and friends, and all of those who were involved in anyway. Victoria is a true hero.
Reblog as a sign of respect for those innocent lives that were lost.
I don’t care what kind of blog you have, no excuse for not reblogging this.
i was kinda worried the new directions wouldn’t get back together again, but then finn and rachel brought them back together, the same way they’ve done for the past three years.
everytime i see something one tree hill on my dash….i just get in this really depressing mood where i don’t know if i should cry or just hold it in….I MISS MY OTH
So, even though…
- Finn and Rachel kissed in the SECOND ever episode of Glee.
- Rachel made it clear she had a massive crush on Finn.
- They kissed for a second time in the fifth episode.
- They continued to get to know each other despite the fact that Finn’s girlfriend was ‘pregnant.’
- Finn always…
I fucking love you! Thank you!!